Stay at home mommy

I have been seeing a lot of people who have been upset for their spouse due to rude comments about stay at home mom’s. I just happen to be one. It’s funny because when someone says ” What do you do”, “Where do you work”, there is always a pause where I look down and say “Oh I am a stay at home mom”. Most of the time people act very nicely about it I’m not going to lie however there is the occasional person who is rude. For a while we lived in Germany and I would get so angry because I consider myself a person who can contribute to a conversation and as soon as they realize that I am a stay at home mom they would literally walk away from me! They just walked away like I couldn’t rub two words together to save my life due to the lack of stimulating work life. I mean what did I have to talk about right, what have I ever done other than change diapers, and feed an infant. It was like they expected me to stop talking about our super important conversation and begin to talk about my daughters first bowel movement.

The last thing I read about this subject,  was a man writing about his wife and people who he had run into. He said someone told him that it must be fun to be able to stay at home. This offended him because  the person just happen to tell him in a coffee shop while they were both clearly on a break from work to which he responded ” I am sure my wife would love a coffee break in the middle of the day” . Would you like to know the truth? Our day is amazing, busy, slow, tiring, confusing and joyful all rolled up into one and we love nap time you know IF the kids actually sleep during that time.  There are so many emotions that can go through you in such a short time it is amazing. You can go from “your the best mommy in the world’ to a temper tantrum in 5 seconds flat and not even know why. Not to mention we also have to run all the errands and find time to feed everyone. I’m not trying to say it is the hardest job in the world I simply just want to point out that we by no means have time to sit on our asses and eat bon bon’s like people like to envision…..Not that I wouldn’t like to.

I have also hit another level of stay at home mom at this point. My kids went to school….I have a first and third grader. So Why don’t I go to work? Here are my answers,

Someone is always sick- I can’t call in once a week because someone is sick how happy would that employer be lets be honest.

I enjoy cooking- I like having stuff ready for my family to eat when everyone gets home and at a decent time. Seven at night is too late to feed little ones.  I also make everything from scratch so if we are having hamburgers I am making the buns, pulling stuff from the garden to put on it and so forth.

Amazingly there is no maid- When I did have a job no maid ever showed up to get everything done during the day. I have things to do and when I worked those things suffered. Plus I didn’t make any money because all of my paycheck minus 400 went to pre-school costs and calling into work because of a sick child.

Do I feel like I need to validate my stay at home mom position…everyday! Oh and If I say that I am tired you should see the looks I get from everyone. How in the hell can you be tired if you have done nothing all day. I also watch two babies twice or three times a week. This is in order to bring a little extra cash into the pot each month. However, I still find myself saying I am a stay at home mom and not….oh I watch two little ones. It’s pointless then I would have to explain why I don’t want to open a business with more kids. Sorry its not that I don’t have drive and want to make more money,  it’s the fact that I like these two babies…and they don’t tare up my house! If you think that all of these things are trivial take into consideration that at least once a week I am up at one or both schools volunteering and this season I am also a Soccer coach. I don’t get paid for what I do in money but my kids are happy and that’s what I am aiming for. I don’t do much to bring money in but I am a saver and I do a lot to save the money that does come in. I am a mommy, an accountant, soccer coach, shoulder to cry on, hair dresser, reading teacher, math teacher, cook, and nurse. No I don’t carry any degree’s for this position but to tell you the truth the only degree I have which is in Business Management is the only one I don’t use.

Before you judge someones life take a step back and think about how you would feel if someone was judging yours. IMG_7963

Advertisements

Oh the joy’s

With a new school year comes new children. Oh they still look like your children but they change let me tell ya. Lately I feel like I have been decoding my youngest. For the first three weeks of school my poor baby came home sad saying she had no friends and had a horrible day. This is odd because this is my little social butterfly and to say that she has no friends and a horrible day is just not right. So after it ran longer than I thought it should I wrote to her teacher. Her teacher said she agreed with me she is very social so she wasn’t sure what was going on. After a day or so I get an e-mail back saying that nobody was being rude or mean to her but they were ignoring her…..well because she was trying to talk to them when it was quiet time and they didn’t want to get into trouble with her. So we sat her down and talked about having proper times to talk and how she can use recess and other certain times to jack her jaws. For two days this seemed to work great! She was a different girl. She came home happy, didn’t complain about anything and didn’t get into trouble at all. Today my sweet little girl waited until the quietest time of the day, blew up her plastic snack bag and popped it. Of course she was rewarded to 20 little bodies giggling at her so now she has been promoted to class clown in the first grade. I have thoughts of the next 11 years of my phone or email going off daily to the effect of “so you know what your daughter did in class today”. Ahh to enjoy the ride this little one takes us on. Wish me luck and as always enjoy 😉

IMG_0577

Rant for the day

Religion….I usually don’t like to talk about religion or even comment on it because I find it to be a very personal subject but here is my problem. People have been given the freedom to live their lives as they see fit as long as they are not harming another person or breaking the laws an even then they are given freedom to do it until they get caught. So why is it that when someone makes their own decision on religion others have so much to say about it. We have waged wars in order to shove religion down peoples throat and tell them how they should feel about religion and what is right. It is exhausting listening to others ideas about what is right and what is wrong. I am sure what you believe you consider right and the person turning blue in the face also considers themselves correct. Further more why is it any of your business to begin with what that person believes in their heart and why is it up for discussion. It’s nobody’s business what you believe and it’s none of your what others believe. When politics and religion begin to tare apart everything around us (family, friends, job, peace) your ideas have gone to far. Take a step back and give people their freedom to choose back. It doesn’t matter if you agree or not. Rant over.IMG_0331

Pet peeve for the day

Ok here goes and I am sure people are going to be upset after reading this one but it has to be said. I love Pinterest as much as the next guy, heck just finding recipes makes me happy. SO here is my thing, I love finding things that I can make for my family that is homemade and doesn’t have all the preservatives in it and extra chemicals that our food should not have in it to begin with. SO when i log on to Pinterest and see a wonderful recipe that looks delicious and has homemade written in the title I just can’t wait to click on it. So lets be clear, if you are writing a recipe and calling it homemade it should not begin with “Open a can of” it is not homemade if you are opening a can of store bought crap! It’s not homemade monkey bread if you start out by opening a can of pre-made rolls. if you make the dough then it is homemade. Thank you that is all for my rant today. As always enjoy 🙂

Thoughts on Marriage and love

I find myself being a bit thoughtful tonight and sometimes this happens often but I find it difficult to watch others go through life and marriage and forget the little things that make each other happy. Steve and I have been married for almost 13 years. We are happy, we have arguments, we compromise, we talk, we love each other and at the end of the day we rely on each other for everything. It’s so easy to get comfortable in your every day life and forget to tell people how you feel about them, and to take people for granted. How often do you walk out the door in the morning and not kiss your spouse or significant other good bye or go to bed without saying goodnight. Why is it so easy to forget to tell the other person how you feel about them and so hard to show your feelings. Wouldn’t you think that the other person in the relationship wants to know how you feel about them? There are so many people yelling and arguing and throwing put downs at each other that they forget to hold on to each other and say I love you. So why am I writing this? Well because I think the majority of people who are thinking about divorce are just there because they forgot to continue to work on their marriage. It’s just like friendship if one person stops talking to the other one it is going to fall apart much less if both people do it. Reach out to your significant other, friends and family and show the people you love that you do in fact love them and make sure that they know they are respected for the person they are. Ok there you go, there is my rant for the day and hopefully I have opened someones eyes 🙂

Thoughts on watching little ones.

I have a little guy that I watch two days a week and the longer I watch him the more I have these thoughts that pop in my head. For instance if you don’t love the child you are watching for someone you don’t need to be watching that child! If you don’t respect the people who are parenting that child and the way they are parenting him or her it isn’t going to work out. When you are caring for a little one who is not your own they need love and care and teaching that you give your own and if you are out only for the paycheck you are doing it for all the wrong reasons. Why do I have these thoughts and feelings…well to start with because I worked for a day care that will not be mentioned for six months. While the children were cared for they were not loved. They were watched until their parents came to pick them up and if you showed love to any of them you were playing favorites. It really is a sad environment. Now that I have my little guy twice a week who was by the way my favorite I could not imagine watching any other child because I would have to find another well behaved child, and parents who actually parented their kids. Surprise Surprise that doesn’t happen anymore. This is nothing more than rants of an ex child care worker but it really is important that if you do have someone watching your child that they love him or her. 🙂

Thoughts on being a good person.

I heard someone random say on TV the other day that people remember the person you were not the looks you carried around with you. I love all of my friends for the people they are, the lives they lead and the things they do for others. It is important to me that people think of me in a good light. I try to be a good person and do for others and for my family. I find myself doing things others would not approve of (like not speaking to my mother for 13 years now) but I do that to protect me and my girls. The people I call family are people who are good to us, people who do not beat others down and someone you don’t fear is nice to your face and then goes and bad mouths you behind your back. Why am I writing all of this down for my friends to read….nothing more than inspiration to be honest. I feel like people get a rush and get around others that speak badly about people and they fall into this unfavorable spot where they don’t voice their opinion. I’m am by no means stating that I am perfect but there is a saying from someone I have no idea but it says basically be nice to others because you have no idea what kinds of battles they are fighting. I try daily to make sure my children are not people who put others down…I know at some point they will and we will have to talk about it but I feel that if I am not that type of person hopefully they wont be. Anyway there are my thoughts on life for the night. Be the type of person someone tells others is a good person. Be the beauty in life and not the ugly.

Image